I will admit it. I get a bit emotional when I fly a kite. Now, if you know me, you may be thinking, “So? You cry at McDonald’s commercials.” This is different. Kites take me to a deep place. Even the brightly colored ones with tree frogs and dolphins on them, although I’ve never teared up over a Pokemon kite. Yet.
When it comes to kites, I don’t pretend to know what I’m doing. A few years ago, quite spontaneously, I bought a kite in a shop on the boardwalk in Ocean City, MD, and so began my infatuation with them. It’s kind of like when there’s a dessert that you can only get in this special place. You don’t get there very often, but every time you’re there you must have it, and it thrills you like the first time. It’s a special joy for me when I get to the beach and just around sunset, I get out there with my kite.
No one ever showed me how to fly a kite. I just strung her up and went for it. Someone who knows what they’re doing may be mortified at my lack of expertise. This last time, I had actually threaded the kite backwards! It didn’t seem to matter. You see, the wind in all its invisible glory, is far more powerful than the kite. It’s almost as if the kite has no choice but to radically obey the twists and turns of air that take it wherever it demands. And the beauty of seeing something so completely surrendered...this is what takes my breath away.
We are a people who protest when anyone tries to tell us what to do or where to go. We have this crazy false sense of autonomy. We think we know better. I don’t know about you, but me being in charge of me, hasn’t worked out so well. I am certain I am at my best, when I am a kite...and the Holy Spirit picks me up and takes me farther and higher than I ever imagined.
And so, yes...I tear up when I fly a kite. Part of it is just the joy of seeing such a tangible expression of freedom and grace and imagining that this is what we were made for.
The other part of it, is simply regret...
for all the times I thought I knew better and resisted what God was desiring to do in me
for all the times I resented His plan and His power to direct my life
for all the ways He took me in directions I never wanted to go and I kicked and screamed all the way
...while all He was trying to do, was bless me.